I noticed a theme this past week, of people being conflicted with their religious beliefs and embracing spirituality. I decided to speak in class this week about religion and spirituality.
I think everyone’s journey is different. Everyone draws on different experiences and what it means to them. I know for me, I was brought up Protestant and my parents really didn’t believe in it, but they would drop us off at Sunday School each week. I wanted to understand the concepts taught, but there wasn’t a lot of good examples that I could relate to my own life. I would listen to the stories and absorb as much as I could understand.
When I met my husband, Tony, he was Catholic and so I went to marriage classes. It didn’t matter to me where we were married, but it did to his family, and so I followed what the protocol was for us to be married in the Catholic church.
When I was pregnant with our twins, I felt a miracle had occurred. There was no doubt in my mind that there is something more to this world, something wonderful and loving, especially when my girls where born. I truly believed in God and brought up the girls to have faith and to respect nature. I started to go to bible study classes and enjoyed hearing these bible stories once again, where I could bring more understanding to them. We had promised to bring our children up Catholic and I liked the idea of the girls having a background and understanding of God and the bible. I too converted and became Catholic myself.
In the bible classes, I liked the way Catholics take from the bible directly and it really reasonated with me. I feel I have something in my past lives to do with Jesus, whether I was one of his followers or I knew of him at that time, I’m not sure. Over the years, since my daughter’s transition to the spirit world, I have had many experiences with Jesus and Angels. This has helped tremendously with my healing. When there was no one to talk to about my grief, I talked to Him. It brought me comfort and He gave me insight to myself and how to heal. Prayer became important for me. I learnt how to speak from my heart. There have been many interactions with Him, but I will tell you of one.
One night I was in bed, it was dark. I awoke to a glowing gold cross in my room. It glowed like there were thousands of rays of golden light emenating from it. I was in awe of what I was seeing. What do you say to Jesus? Instead I decided to let that go and enjoy the experience. The cross started moving towards me and was getting smaller. It disappeared into my heart. It still brings tears to me and a feeling of humility. How blessed I am! I felt He was telling me that he is in my heart, and so He is. He continues to bring me comfort and guidance and I know he walks with me daily. I am not unique, for He can be with all of us and probably is eventhough we don’t know it.
When my daughter died, I felt that there was a great change coming over my family and myself. I did not know where this new path would lead us, but I had faith that we would survive this and possibly thrive? I felt that hope was important. Although I didn’t understand much, with time the pieces did start to fall into place. This was not without me making a choice to try to live in our new world without our daughter. For me to try for my surviving daughter and try for my husband. To try for myself would come much later.
I decided to set much of my beliefs aside and embrace this new path of spirituality. I was looking for answers and the Catholic religion didn’t satisfy me. The answers lay beyond this world. This I knew.
Along the way, my religious beliefs crept back. Jesus, Angels, God became very important to me and still are. The experiences I’ve had and the visions that were sent to me everyday for three years, confirmed of what I knew to be true. There is more than what we see with our physical eyes, that there is no death and that my child lives and is happy.
It doesn’t have to be one way or another. It is possible to blend religion and spirituality together. There is a myth that this is not acceptable, but ask someone on the spiritual path and many times they will acknowledge that they walk with Angels and that there is a Creator that is Life itself.
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